Tuesday, March 27, 2007

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Photos Removed

Boo!

Just another quick update.

I just browse through all my previous posts and removed all photos with me in it... Well, after all I kind of feeling unsecured by having them here, even this blog is already privatized. =(

I guess it's gonna be ok, as long as I have it in my comp.

Oh well...

^StarrY^

Friday, March 23, 2007

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Finally, it's over!

Boo~

Yeah, finally, it's over... What is over? My semester! Hehehe, the stressful semester, the killing assignments and projects... All over. Should I be happy about it? I doubt so... Why? Because I did not do well in this semester, pretty much screwed I would say... Sad... =(

I don't know what's the real problem here, either I myself changed, to be someone without any motivation, no more perfectionist, no more caring about studies... I don't know... or izzit there are some other stuff out there that made me like this? Hmm...

What done is done, no point cracking my head to think of something I probably won't have any answers in the end... All I can do now is to score well in my exams, hopefully able to help out a bit and bring up my grades... But, can I really do it? Judging from past experience, it's gonna be hard, really hard.

So, what should I do now? I don't know but I guess instead of thinking about this, I will choose to relax and enjoy my holidays for a while before deciding to study from my exams, which is 2 weeks from now... I don't know how will it turn out, oh well...

I have come this far, enduring everything just to get the certificate I gonna get end of this year, it's gonna be a waste if I give up now, isn't it? Whether it's gonna be too late or not, I guess the rational thing to do is to brush up my skills and knowledge and do well in the next and final semester, I hope I can do it, I hope... =)

^StarrY^

Monday, March 19, 2007

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Heroes

Boo!

Wondering what heroes? That hero? This hero? Haha... I am talking about a recent English TV Show I have been watching, Heroes. I guess everyone knows about it, or is already a fan of that series, hehe... XD Well, I myself like this series a lot, seeing I am not really a fan of English TV Series. Actually, it was my friends that got me into this, haha, well, I have to thank them! =)

Well, it's up to 18 episodes now and the series stopped! Heroes went on vacation! Hahaha... It will be back on air at 23 April, looooooooong way to go. Anyway, while waiting and waiting and waaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiitting... Let's watch the preview, I got this from YouTube, sent to me by Eve. ^^



Enjoy ya!

^StarrY^

Thursday, March 15, 2007

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New Layout

Boo!

Just a quick update, I changed my blog template again! Well, today I was supposed to do some stuff for my FYP, ended up no mood, browsing some blogs and finally decided to change my own blog layout.

This layout is edited from a free-downlaodable layout that I got from Blogger Templates. The original template is black and pink color, named Rawk. So I downloaded the files, edited some codes and the pictures...

Tadah! Here it is! My new blog layout.

Third layout of my blog.

Enjoy.

^StarrY^

Resignation from Blueserver

Boo~

This post is dedicated to my recent resignation from Blueserver, as the Chief Banlist Operator, on 5 March 2007.

Many may question, wonder and don't get the reason why I choose to resign, frankly, I am not so sure about it myself. Things have been going up and down so drastically that I do not even have any time to think about anything. If you have read some of my previous post, you should know that I am already being confused and lost since last year.

Until today, if someone were to ask me whether I will regret quitting from Blueserver, my answer is still uncertain, I do not know whether did I choose the right thing to do. Anyway, here are some reasons or events happened recently that triggers my mind and finally made me come to this conclusion.
  • My college assignments are piled up, together with my FYP, is giving me a lot of pressure as I have my own target to reach in order to obtain good results during my graduation later in September. This pressure might be created by my own laziness, well, most probably it is, but I can't help it, I got no motivation at all.
  • The feeling is being useless in a team, seeing others working so hard, spending sleepless nights to complete their given tasks, yet I cannot do anything to help, or you should say, I did not do anything to help at all. What is being more useless that being the person who request others to finish their jobs yet did not do any herself? I just cannot accept the fact, I am not that kind of person, I don't wanna be that kind of person.
  • The downfall of the entire administration system, with the resignation from almost all seniors together has almost broke my heart, made me truly disappointed and I have lost something I have always believe in. Some people chose to take advantage of the situation, some people chose not to care at all, some people chose to save the situation, but in the end, nothing can be done. Everything is ruined, whatever plans that is discussed before became completely useless. I am seriously wounded deep inside my heart, seeing all these right in front of my own eyes, yet being useless again.
  • I finally realize that no matter how hard I try, there is a limit what I alone can do, what I can change. I realize how weak I am, when I face the challenges placed in front of me. I am no longer the same enthusiastic and dedicated person I used to be, I chose to run away from problems rather than solving them. I feel scared, I feel lost, I ran away from reality.
  • I discovered another ugly truth of life, power changes people, friends can become foe, wars can be easily triggered, innocent people get involved, I got hurt badly again. Is power so important that everything else can be forgotten and ignored? I don't know, I never wanted any power before, all I want to do is help, all I wish to see is a better future, but all I see today is politics, corruption, abuses. What an ugly world, sad but there's nothing we can do.
In the end, instead of solving everything that is happening, I chose to leave. Maybe some people would think that I am just too weak, I am just another typical girl in this world that cannot stand all kinds of challenges in life, so yea, maybe that's just me.

My dedication, my contribution, my status all buried forever on 5 March 2007. I might not be anyone in Blueserver anymore but I will always be there to protect what I always wanted to protect, I will do what I can, as a normal player in Blueserver, to protect and fulfill my dreams.

Whether will I regret or not one day, I will never regret joining the team, after all, I found a lot of things that is very important to me in my life, in Blueserver. I have my beloved darling, EdeNz, I have my best buddies, Kaelz, Whitey, Bitbit, Kiki, Nonnie, Sys, Matt, ... A lot more..., I have gain so much experience in people handling, team management, etc..., I have lots and lots of valuable stuff that even money cannot buy. I am really glad to have all of these with me, I will treasure them forever, I will not forget what Blueserver has gave me. Thanks!

^StarrY^

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

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Cute Avatar, Emoticons, Icons and Wallpapers

Boo~

Just a short update to share something nice with everyone. =)

Avatar and Emoticons of Onion Head, Download Full Pack from here.

Cute Icons and Wallpapers from PixelGirlPresents They have both icons for Windows and Mac OS. Very cute and creative. This site is recommended by a friend of mine, Eve. I am still downloading their wallpapers, hehe... They have all kinds of genre, have fun browsing!

^StarrY^

Monday, March 12, 2007

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Back after a month or two?

Boo~

Yea, I am posting again, after "disappearing" for such a long time from my blog. It's not that I wish to stop blogging anymore, but I just couldn't allocate any time for this... =(

I just hand up my final assignment for this semster today, but my stressful days is not over yet, I still need to prepare for my FYP viva, on next week or the week after... Sadly, I have not done anything much yet.

A lot of things happened over this past two months, too many, too stressful... Things finally cooled down, settled a little bit and I can breathe a little. Maybe I will tell more stories in future post, if I have the mood to do so...

I am hoping that time can pass by faster, holidays can come faster, I seriously needs a rest, I need a break from all of this...

^StarrY^
 

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